101 Funny Thanksgiving Puns (The Best List Ever!)

Thanksgiving is perhaps one of the most widely celebrated and deeply enjoyed holidays of the year across millions of families in the United States. Maybe it’s because it combines some of our favorite things – no work, no school, the company of good family and friends, and of course, tons of great food. So yes, you could say that the day was specially configured to make it particularly easy to think of all the things you might feel grateful for.

And while a subtle flame snaps and crackles in the fireplace, it sets the backdrop for your cozy, comfortable get together. And in that very moment, the idea hits you – it’s probably time to post an Instagram photo. You squeeze together to capture the perfect social media worthy image, and you add your filters to bring out all those beautiful fall colors. But now the predicament – what’s the right caption for this fun family photo?

While a long, winding, emotionally-driven caption might suit some, a short, sweet, and humorous pun is easier to read and might attract more likes and reactions. But the question – what are the funniest Thanksgiving puns? Whether you’re using the short snippet for a Facebook post, or if you’re hoping to keep them in tote to squeeze into conversation, we’ve got you covered.

We’ve compiled some of the funniest Thanksgiving puns around so you can find the perfect one-liner or joke to make those meaningful moments even more memorable with a few heartfelt laughs.

Funniest Thanksgiving One-Liner Puns

Who doesn’t appreciate a little word play? Puns can be a hoot to hear and share, especially if you’ve got the words right. Clever and witty, these one-liner quips can encapsulate the theme of any Thanksgiving photo, or might even make a suitable conversation starter for those family members and friends that you just haven’t talked to in a while. Loosen up the crowd or rake in the likes with these funny Thanksgiving puns.

1. That was plucking hilarious!
2. Is that your pop-up timer or are you just happy to see me?
3. Enough with the prelude and let’s get stuffed.
4. You know I’m all about that baste.
5. It’s time to get basted!
6. Oh my gourdness, I plucking love fall.
7. The goal is to gobble until you wobble.
8. Let’s get the gourd times rolling.
9. Eat, drink, and cranberry!
10. Getting the longer half of the wishbone is a snap.
11. Family, friends, food – it doesn’t get any butter than this.
12. You think I’m done? Honey, you ain’t seen stuffing yet.
13. We can worry about the Christmas tree some other time. Tonight is all about the poul-tree.
14. Green bean casserole, pumpkin pie, mashed potatoes – when it’s Thanksgiving, there’s always more than just one side to the story.
15. This celebration is totally my jam.
16. I only have pies for you.
17. Hey, I just met you, and this is gravy. But here’s my stuffing, so carve me maybe.

Funny Thanksgiving Jokes

Who would pass up the chance to make family and friends smile? Thanksgiving jokes can be a smart way to start a conversation, to lighten the mood after some heartfelt sharing, or to spice up a social media post. But if you’re running low on the witty quips, we’ve got you covered. This list of funny Thanksgiving jokes can have your friends and family laughing through the night, letting you weave more memories by keeping the atmosphere light and effortless.

1. Yeah, sure, abs are great. But have you ever had pumpkin pie?
2. It’s all fun and games until your pant buttons come undone.
3. Leftovers?
   Show answer
   Leftovers are for quitters, and we ain’t quitters.
4. Why did the turkey cross the road?
   Show answer
   Because it was Thanksgiving and he wanted to get out of sight.
5. What do turkeys eat for dessert?
   Show answer
   Peach gobbler.
6. Why did the cranberries turn red?
   Show answer
   Because they saw the turkey dressing.
7. Why do pilgrims’ pants never stay up?
   Show answer
   Because their belt buckles are on their hats.
8. What did the turkey say to the computer voice recognition?
   Show answer
   “Google, Google, Google.”
9. What do you get when you cross a turkey with a centipede?
   Show answer
   Unlimited drumstick buffet!
10. What did the turkey tell the hunter on Thanksgiving day?
    Show answer
    “Quack quack!”
11. What’s the key to a successful Thanksgiving celebration?
    Show answer
    Tur-key!
12. Why did the police take the turkey in for questioning?
    Show answer
    He sense fowl play.
13. What sound does a turkey make when you take its legs?
    Show answer
    “Wobble, wobble!”
14. What’s the difference between a pirate and a cranberry farmer?
    Show answer
    A pirate buries his treasure, while a cranberry farmer treasures his berries.
15. What do you call a turkey on the day after Thanksgiving?
    Show answer
    Lucky.
16. What do you call a love story between a pilgrim and a turkey?
    Show answer
    50 Shades of Gravy
17. What do you call it when a group of people take turns making fun of the thanksgiving turkey?
    Show answer
    A roast.
18. What’s the best music to play at Thanksgiving dinner?
    Show answer
    Plymouth Rock.
19. What dessert do mathematicians prefer to eat during Thanksgiving?
    Show answer
    Pumpkin pi
20. Why didn’t the chef add any spices to her Thanksgiving roast?
    Show answer
    She didn’t have the thyme.
21. What did the pilgrim call his friends?
    Show answer
    His pal-grims.
22. What’s the best dance step to use at a Thanksgiving party?
    Show answer
    Twerky.
23. Did you know that the pilgrims came over on smoke-colored ships designed by a guy named Valentine?
    Show answer
    You might call them gray V-boats.
24. What’s the most appropriate outfit for Thanksgiving dinner?
    Show answer
    A har-vest.
25. I’m tired of eating Thanksgiving left overs for weeks after the celebration. That’s not happening this year – I’m quitting cold turkey.
26. What do turkeys eat on Thanksgiving?
    Show answer
    Nothing – they’re too stuffed.
27. What happened to the turkey when he got into a fist fight?
    Show answer
    He got the stuffing knocked out of him.
28. Why did the pilgrims avoid telling their secrets while they were in the cornfields?
    Show answer
    Because the corn had ears.
29. Why did the turkey refuse to play any instrument other than the drums?
    Show answer
    Because he already had the drumsticks for it.
30. My family keeps telling me to stop it with the corny Thanksgiving jokes, but I can’t just quit cold turkey.
31. If a large turkey is called a gobbler, what do you call the smaller ones?
    Show answer
    Goblets.
32. What do Halloween and Thanksgiving have in common?
    Show answer
    Gobble-ins!
33. Knock knock. Who’s there?
    Show answer
    Normal Lee. Normal Lee who? Normal Lee, I don’t eat this much!
34. Knock knock. Who’s there?
    Show answer
    Tamara. Tamara who? Tamara, we’re having turkey leftovers for sure.
35. What did the turkey say before he was popped into the oven?
    Show answer
    “Boy, am I stuffed!”
36. What is a pumpkin’s favorite sport?
    Show answer
    Squash
37. What would you get if you crossed Halloween with Thanksgiving?
    Show answer
    A poultry-geist.
38. What did the mommy turkey say to her baby turkeys?
    Show answer
    “if your father could see you now, he would be turning in his gravy.”
39. What do you call it when it rains turkeys?
    Show answer
    Fowl weather
40. Why can’t you take a turkey to church?
    Show answer
    Because they use fowl language
41. If fruit comes from fruit trees, where do turkeys come from?
    Show answer
    Poul-trees
42. Why did the turkey let out a scream?
    Show answer
    Because he was caught dressing.
43. Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?
    Show answer
    The outside
44. What smells the best on Thanksgiving day?
    Show answer
    Your nose
45. What do most women and turkeys have in common?
    Show answer
    Guys are only ever interested in their breasts
46. What happens when you teach a turkey to play the harp?
    Show answer
    You get a turkey that can pluck on its own
47. If the pilgrims were still around today, what would they be best known for?
    Show answer
    Their age
48. What’s blue and covered in feathers?
    Show answer
    A turkey holding its breath.
49. Why didn’t the pilgrim want to make the Thanksgiving bread?
    Show answer
    He thought it was a crumby job
50. What’s the easiest recipe for pumpkin pie?
    Show answer
    Simple – just divide the pumpkin’s circumference by its diameter
51. What did the obstetrician say while she was cooking Thanksgiving dinner?
    Show answer
    “The turkey’s dilated to 2.5 inches, we’ve got crowning stuffing, it’s time to eat!”
52. Why was the Thanksgiving band unable to play their set?
    Show answer
    Because someone ate the drumsticks
53. You think you’re crazy about Thanksgiving?
    Show answer
    Turkeys literally lose their heads at that time of year.
54. How can you tell the difference between a female and a male turkey?
    Show answer
    The male turkey is usually the one holding the remote
55. What do musicians put on their turkey during Thanksgiving dinner?
    Show answer
    Groovy.
56. What did the little baby corn as her momcorn?
    Show answer
    Will popcorn come?
57. How did Albert Einstein celebrate Thanksgiving?
    Show answer
    He always tried to remember what he was thinkful for.
58. What do you call cranberries when they’re not happy?
    Show answer
    Blue berries
59. What type of cracker would pilgrims use for their smores?
    Show answer
    A pilgraham cracker.
60. What would happen if you combined Thanksgiving and Easter?
    Show answer
    Feaster Sunday
61. Why did the pilgrim eat the candle off of the Thanksgiving table?
    Show answer
    He wanted a light snack before dinner.
62. What did the small turkeys tell the big turkey bully?
    Show answer
    Peck on someone your own size!
63. What do you get after eating too much turkey, stuffing, and sides than you can handle?
    Show answer
    You get dessert, of course.
64. What does a turkey with 6 legs taste like?
    Show answer
    No one knows, they’re hard to catch.
65. Why do we have Thanksgiving holiday?
    Show answer
    So we know when we need to get started on Christmas shopping.
66. Why was the Thanksgiving soup so darn expensive?
    Show answer
    It had 24 carrots
67. When is the best time to serve a tofu turkey?
    Show answer
    At Pranksgiving.
68. What did the turkey tell the man who was trying to shoot him?
    Show answer
    Liberty, Equality, and Bad Aim for all.
69. What sounds to turkeys make when they’re in outerspace?
    Show answer
    Hubble, Hubble, Hubble.
70. Thanksgiving is wonderful because people tend to spend less time talking when their mouths are stuffed with food.
71. If you don’t want to sit at the kids’ table during Thanksgiving dinner, then you probably haven’t watched the Hunger Games.
72. They should change the Thanksgiving name to something more appropriate, like the Turkeypocalypse.
73. Do you think there’s life after Thanksgiving, asked one turkey to another.
74. How do turkeys drunk their wine?
    Show answer
    Inside gobblets.
75. What’s one good reason you should save leftover turkey for tomorrow?
    Show answer
    So it doesn’t go to waist.
76. What’s one thing we can all be thankful for on Thanksgiving?
    Show answer
    That we’re not turkeys.
77. Where’s one country where Thanksgiving is never celebrated?
    Show answer
    Turkey!
78. If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flower bring?
    Show answer
    Pilgrims.
79. Why did little Johnny get such low grades after Thanksgiving?
    Show answer
    Because everything is marked down after the holidays.
80. What do you call a dumb, dried out gobbler?
    Show answer
    A jerky turkey.
81. What has feathers and webbed feet?
    Show answer
    A turkey getting ready to go scuba diving.
82. What kind of vegetable would be the best for Thanksgiving dinner?
    Show answer
    Beets me!
83. How can you make a turkey float?
    Show answer
    Well, you start out with root beer, vanilla ice cream, and a turkey.
84. What’s the best way to keep a turkey in suspense?
    Show answer
    I’ll let you know next week.

Making Thanksgiving Memories

Funny Thanksgiving puns can brighten up any room and bring more laughs to the table. So whether you’re hoping to share a few good chuckles with the fam and the rest of the gang, or if you’re trying to come up with a clever Instagram post to commemorate the moment, we’ve got the perfect puns to help you on the way.

We hope you enjoyed reading through our list of 101 funny Thanksgiving puns, one-liners, and jokes! Brighten up that holiday feast with these hilarious phrases that you can use to put a smile on everyone’s face so they can have just one more thing to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.

Susan Box Mann

Susan majored in English with a double minor in Humanities and Business at Arizona State University and earned a Master’s degree in Educational Administration from Liberty University. She taught grades four through twelve in both public and private schools. Subjects included English, U.S. and world history and geography, math, earth and physical science, Bible, information technologies, and creative writing.

Susan has been freelance writing for over ten years, during which time she has written and edited books, newspaper articles, biographies, book reviews, guidelines, neighborhood descriptions for realtors, Power Point presentations, resumes, and numerous other projects.

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