People like to make fun of pick-up lines, but they’re common for a reason. While sexy pick-up lines may not be everyone’s cup of tea, they’re a great way to test the waters with a potential love interest. True, one too many hot pick-up lines may scare off a few fuddy-duddies, but let’s be honest – do you really want to date someone who can’t take a joke?
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This list of pick-up lines ranges from slightly risque (PG-13) to ultra explicit (XXX), so there’s a line here for the bold and the timid alike. Just be careful – the more forward you are, the more likely you are to be rudely rejected if you pick the wrong person to use it on. It may be wise to test your luck with a milder pick-up line before you get too spicy.
A pick-up line doesn’t have to be aggressive to be effective. Flirty pick-up lines can help you break the ice by getting a smile or even a laugh from the person who’s caught your eye. You might get a couple of eye rolls from your friends, but a person with a sense of humor might at least give you a chance to make a good second impression if you start with one of these lines.
Practice Makes Perfect
I don’t want to have kids with you, but I’m happy to help you practice.
A Place to Lay My Head
My bed is broken. Can I use yours?
Have a Seat
Sorry, that seat is taken, but you can come and sit on my lap if you’d like. We’ll talk about whatever pops up.
Did you just come from a bakery? Because you’ve got the hottest pair of buns I’ve seen all week.
Do I know you from somewhere? No? You just look so familiar. I must be mistaking you for my future wife.
I’d give you my phone number, but I seem to have lost it. Could I borrow yours?
Hard of Hearing
Sorry, what did you say your name was? I want to make sure I have it right when I’m screaming it later.
I’m a pirate, and I’m coming for that booty.
I can’t find my treasure anywhere. Can I search your chest and see if it’s there?
Well, lucky me. I’ve checked off my whole to-do list except for one thing – you.
I’ve got to admit, I was feeling a little off earlier. But the minute you walked in, you turned me on.
You’ll have to excuse me if I seem a little off tonight. I just watched a documentary about the water crisis, and I feel like I have to do something. Will you shower with me to conserve water?
Do you have a cell phone in your back pocket? Because your ass is calling to me.
I think you must be in the wrong bar. The wet T-shirt contest is next door. Follow me, I’ll take you there.
I hope you never change, but leave your clothes off if you do.
Take a Load Off
Your feet must be sore from running around my mind all day. Why don’t you come back to my place and put them up on my shoulders?
You must have been born on the moon because your body is out of this world.
Naughty or Nice
Want to help me get on Santa’s naughty list this year?
Feel my pants – they’re made of girlfriend material.
We Both Win
We should settle this with a tongue-wrestling match. Loser buys dinner.
If you’re wondering where you’ve seen me before, I was in your dreams last night.
I’m afraid of the dark, and my nightlight went out last night. Will you keep me company tonight?
Sorry for staring – I’m just so jealous of your drink. You’ve got your hands wrapped around it when they should be wrapped around me.
No way! I didn’t know they had snacks here!
If I put you on my to-do list, will you check my box?
Anyone can use a run-of-the-mill pick-up line, but sometimes you’re looking for something a little bit friskier. Naughty pick-up lines are a great way to let the recipient know that you’re wilder than you look without risking a slap in the face for being too forward. Not everyone appreciates sexy pick-up lines like these, but use them on the right person, and you might just get lucky.
Trick or Treat
I’m like a haunted house – you’re going to scream when you get inside me.
That dress looks great on you, but I bet it would look even better on my bedroom floor.
I can’t remember where I put my keys. Do you mind if I check inside your pants?
You must be a postal worker because I just caught you inspecting my package.
That dress looks really good on you, but you know what would look even better? Me.
You look like you’re feeling a little down. Would you like me to feel you up?
Sorry if I seem a little distracted tonight. I’m just not really feeling myself. I’d much rather be feeling you.
When I was in school, all I wanted was to get an A. But now, when I look at you, all I want is the D.
Let’s play Titanic. You be the iceberg, and I’ll be the ship. First, we’ll smash, and then I’ll go down.
Here, flip this coin, then give me whatever comes up.
Is that a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.
I want to pin you to my wall like a Sports Illustrated poster.
I’m an archaeologist, and you’ve got a large bone I need to examine.
I must be turning into a beaver because I can’t stop thinking about putting your wood in my mouth.
If you’re looking for a deal, you should check out the sale in my bed. Everything’s on clearance, but clothes are 100% off.
Some people call it being forward, but you call it being upfront about your intentions. Why bother beating around the bush when you’re looking for someone just as frisky as you are? These sexual pick-up lines are anything but subtle, but if subtlety isn’t your thing, then give one a go. The worst that can happen is that the recipient will say no – rudely, perhaps, but that’s it.
(Unless, of course, you’re using these lines on someone in front of their partner, in which case you go at your own risk. Jealous partners are no joke, so use these lines wisely.)
Excuse me, I’m so sorry to bother you, but I’m from NASA, and I’ve just received my next assignment. I’m under strict orders to conduct an exploratory mission of Uranus. Do I have permission to land?
Waste Not, Want Not
My biggest passion is saving the planet. Speaking of which, this condom is about to expire. Want to help me make sure it doesn’t go to waste?
Do Your Chores
You can call me dishes because I want you to get me wet and do me all night long.
A Favorable Prediction
I just checked the weather report, and there’s a 95% chance you’re getting six inches tonight.
Any Time of Day
I usually prefer sunrises over sunsets, but I’d gladly watch you go down.
Highs and Lows
You must be an elevator because I want to go up and down on you all day.
The Most Dangerous Game
If I were a hunter, I’d mount you in every room in my house.
Getting Ahead of Myself
Hmm, that’s odd. My magic watch says you’re naked in my bed right now. It must be running a little fast.
Quick, I need your help! A thief is chasing me, and he’s trying to steal my penis. Do you have somewhere I could hide it?
I just got back from the doctor. She says I have a vitamin deficiency. Will you come back to my place and give me the D?
Netflix and Chill
I just got a huge new mirror in my bedroom. Would you like to come over and watch some porn with me?
I’ve got a carnival game we can play. I’ll sit on your face, and you try to guess how much I weigh.
Around the World
When we’re done French kissing, I’ll teach you the Australian kiss. It’s the same thing, but down under.
I’ll let you make me breakfast in the morning. I like my eggs fertilized.
If you were a toe, I’d bang you on every wall, table, and chair in this bar.
You must be a chicken farmer because you know exactly how to raise my cock.
What’s your favorite thing to eat in bed? After tonight, it’ll be your second favorite thing.
Stay In School
Pretend I’m your homework, spread me out on the table, and do me until you can’t see straight.
Can I call you Medusa? Because the minute you look at me, I get rock hard.
Just Add Heat
You must be a T-bone steak because you’re hot, juicy, and rare right now, but you’ll be well-done by morning.
There’s a chill in the air, and I forgot my scarf. Want to wrap your legs around my neck instead?
What time do your legs open? I don’t want to be late.
Let’s go back to my place, and I’ll give you head. If you don’t like it, you can give it back.
If you want to be even more forward than the lines above, you can choose one of these ultra-freaky pick-up lines and see where things lead you. Beware, though, because these lines are not for the faint of heart. If the recipient is especially naughty, you might get somewhere with these lines, but some people may find them gross or even offensive, so use with caution.
Do you want to sign for my package, or should I just slip it in your box?
The Next Best Thing
I lost my virginity a long time ago, but I’ll give you the box it came in.
Exception to the Rule
I’d never kick you out of bed unless you wanted me to do you on the floor.
Want to play a game? I’ll be the squirrel, you be the tree, and I’ll bust a nut in your hole.
It looks like all the seats are taken. I guess you’ll just have to sit on my face.
Thanks a Latte
I’ll take you how I take my coffee – hot, creamy, and in my mouth.
You’re like a grocery store sample because I want to eat you right here in front of everyone without a hint of shame.
F*ck me if I’m wrong, but aren’t you Betty White?
Turn Me In
You’d better call PETA because I’m about to eat that p*ssy alive.
I’m going to eat you like an Oreo cookie – open you up and lick the cream out of the middle.
Go Big or Go Home
You look too good for a pick-up line, so let’s cut to the chase – want to f*ck?
We hope you’ve enjoyed this list of flirty, sexy, and downright dirty pick-up lines. Whether you’re looking for a way to break the ice or just hoping for a laugh, a pick-up line is usually a smart move. While it may not win your potential love interest over immediately, it will probably at least make them smile, which is one foot in the door.
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i absolutely loved these me and my husband laughed at these so much